Saturday, October 29, 2011

..and some bad news..

Oldest sister lost her baby.  That is very sad.  She had to call up DH to tell him, since we're going to see them at a wedding next weekend.  What a rough phone call to make, eh?  If I ever do get pg, I don't know how I will keep the news to myself for three months - but the alternative of the un-pg conversations... very rough.  Poor Oldest Sister.

I know she had a tough pregnancy from a morning-sickness point of view, so... I don't know why, but that makes it seem extra bad?  This is one of those times I want to know all about it, but probably won't say more than "we're sorry for your loss".  Particularly since (it seems to me) Chinese people aren't really open about death, it is more of a private thing.

I'm 100% sure she's going to be looking fabulous - she's very fashionable, and I don't think she would have gained any weight.  But saying "you look fabulous!" - does that imply "since you're not pregnant"?  Yikes.  Poor Oldest Sister.  I wonder if they will try again?  I will aim to not let that question pop out.  IF anything, I am learning what sort of questions are very hurtful.  Three years ago I totally would have asked.

2 comments:

  1. I'm sorry to hear that, CS. Yeah, reading IF blogs has certainly helped increase the understanding of how to respond or not respond to a loss like this. I have seen a lot of women say that they need other people to acknowledge it, so maybe: "I'm so sorry for your loss. If you ever want to talk about it, I'm here."...that way, she has the option of talking to you about it or not. It's so hard.
    Love,
    Maddy

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