Saturday, March 31, 2012

Next week in Endometriosis friendly cookery

Here is our plan for next week.  I do feel like the world of chicken has been opened up to me.  I have been sort of  'off' chicken since about 2004 when I got awful Salmonella poisoning from a chicken sandwich.  I said to myself, if I hadn't had that chicken, 3 days of my life would have been so much more pleasant (to make matters worse I was home for a funeral, and all my relatives kept asking if I was anorexic because I couldn't eat).  But I'm over it - if chicken is one of the few meats I can eat - I'm back, baby!

We went to the market and bought a fancy frozen local free range pasture fed chicken.  Woohoo!  BUT, at the market (we drove like lazy people), I was in a lot of pain, we quickly bought some organic carrots and were outta there.

Tonight (Sat) :  Quinoa tabouli with steamed wild cod.  The Tabouli last week was SO GOOD, I asked for it again!  I like it easy on the quinoa and heavy on the parsley.

Tomorrow:  We are going out with friends from my past life for Greek food.  What on earth will I eat?  I am thinking fish and potatoes.

Mon:  I have a hankering for cabbage rolls, but this is unrealistic from a time point of view, so we're going to cook all the parts separately and enjoy.  (The beef is grass fed organic from my friend the beef farmer, so I am thinking it is ok to eat beef like twice a month.  Opinions?)

Tues:  Chicken stew.  I suspect this will end up Greek-ish with lemon and olives and potatoes.  Yum!

Wed:  Adobo chicken.  I may make it with hominy, or maybe just organic corn tortillas.  There is a tiny bit of cilantro popping up in the garden we'll use, and avocado.   I loooove mexican food, it isn't easy here.  :)

Thurs:  Red lentil avgolomeno.  This will use those lovely organic carrots from the market, and any other veg around.

Fri:  Greek brown lentil/tomato soup (from a cookbook - first time we're making it). 

Friday, March 30, 2012

Two steps forward, two steps back

So while it has been seeming like every day I've been getting a bit better (good, good, progress), yesterday was AWFUL!  WTIF!

If we backup to Wednesday, I had a friend over around 3pm.  We walked to the grocery store (about a block away) - I had also done this on Tuesday with no ill effects.  We then chatted for an hour or so (maybe more) - I was semi-setting up on the couch.  After she left I was quite ouchy, so I took an Ox.y.

I missed my evening Naproxen (probably due to the Oxy I didn't need it).  I woke up at 4am Thursday in the most pain I've been in since the surgery (weird, right?).  So I took another Oxy.  I slept very poorly the rest of the night, by the morning I was feeling awful.

All day Thursday I felt sick and awful.  I had to take a G.ravol in the morning and one in the evening.  (From someone that never takes any pills besides vitamins, I've become a huge pill popper!) I've been taking a little walk every day, but yesterday I was literally on the couch all day, a bit dizzy even with the Gravo.l.

I seem to be better today, but I'm going to take it easy.  It is funny, on Wednesday I was commenting on how good I was feeling - but Thursday came along and I am suddenly very glad I have another week recovery away from work.  I think I was feeling so good because I mostly lay down all day - I think too much sitting up isn't so good?  Or it was something I ate?  Or the O.xy?  (I don't trust that stuff, even though it does help immensely with the pain). 

Monday, March 26, 2012

Endometriosis Diet Ideas!

So now that I officially have endo, as I have mentioned I am going to try to stick to the endo diet.  But if you google it, it is a bunch of 'no's - there aren't a lot of cohesive books or lists of recipes to try.  There is one self-published book I have ordered, but that isn't here yet.

So anyway, I thought I would post my weekly meal plan, to give some ideas to any other ladies out there with endo or suspected endo.  (For lunch I generally have dinner leftovers, so these are dinners only).  I will try to keep a longer list in the 'Endometriosis Meal Ideas' page that is linked to above (also this will be a good reminder for me as I'm making up our weekly meal plan - sometimes "What should we eat on Wednesday?" can take us ages to sort out)

We don't always 100% stick to the plan, but this is generally how we buy groceries - it is more optimal, we end up with less waste this way.  (We add on random fruits and veg to bring for lunch, but this week DH is not wanting me to eat raw foods yet, because he is Chinese).

Sun:  Wild salmon with DH's special topping (black olives in oil, sundried tomato, almonds and garlic - YUM!), baked.  Brown rice and green beans.

Mon:  Organic chicken tacos with organic corn tortillas, avocado, br rice, cilantro and tomatoes.

Tues:  White bean (likely it will be navy) stew with leftover chicken and random veg (carrots, celery, onions)

Weds:  Quinoa Tabouli with sardines.  (We buy skinless/boneless sardines - they are YUMMY.  Try them!)

Thurs:  Sweet Potato + red lentil soup (pureed)

Fri:  Some sort of wild fish, cauliflower (supposed to be good to reduce estrogen) and quinoa.

Saturday, March 24, 2012

Slowly Going


So I'm slowly getting better.  I actually did need to dip into the Oxy yesterday - I had abandoned Tylenol and Napr.oxen as I didn't think they were really working... but this I think was incorrect.  It was ok though - nothing bad has happened when I took it, besides the pain going away.  I had expected everything to get better a little faster, but Friday was a bit tougher than Thursday, strangely.

I do have a tiny bit of shoulder pain, but it isn't so bad.

The worst thing is that I haven't "dropped the kids off at the pool" yet, if you know what I'm saying.  I was taking a medicine to help with this, but then realised it had mannitol and sorbitol in it - no thank you!  Those sugar alcohols really disagree with me, and if I'm having some trouble with the business, no way I want any risk of that.  (They destroy your colon.  Stay away.  Just sayin')

I also forgot to mention a few things from my surgery:  I have known I had a little fibroid since Nov 2010.  I think it was like 1cm or less, can't quite remember.  All docs said it was no big deal, since it was outside the uterus, not inside.  Well, apparently it was now the size of a golf ball - so they snipped it off.  Good.  Maybe that was causing me some randomly mid-month abdominal pain.  Apparently my Mom and Aunt have had fibroids (large ones) too, so I would rather get it outta there.  I wonder if the Clo.mid made it grow?

Also, Dr Love told DH my left tube was partially blocked.  I think this is a big deal.  It wasn't blocked last November.  So in that time endo grew and blocked it.  Yikes.  Scary stuff!  We had been going on the premise that my tubes were fully open.  So, endo diet for me hardcore for a while.  I don't want any growing back! 

I had a shower today - yay for clean hair!  :)

Thursday, March 22, 2012

And the results from surgery are.... (drum roll please)...

Stage III endo!

Surgery took 2hrs 15 min, so they tell me.  Dr Love came by before surgery to chat, that was nice.  The nurses gushed over how nice he was.  He really was like a kindly gentleman all day.  There was also a fellow and a resident.  I liked the fellow, she was young and chipper.  I was a bit worried about the anaesthesia, but the Anesthesiologist said "Don't worry honey, I am going to take good care of you.", which was really quite soothing.

I woke up after surgery and promptly vomited.  Then they gave me some fantastic nausea medication - it really did work within a minute or two.  Eventually I went down to 2nd stage recovery and sort of slept for an hour before they let DH in.  I don't really sleep very well in the day, so although very sleepy, I sort of just laid there.  When it was time to try to pee (you know, the big test that says you can go home) I couldn't and barfed again, so they gave me some gravel and THAT did make me sleepy, I think I slept for half an hour after that.  I was actually woken up by Dr Love coming by to check up on me before he left for the day.  Then I tried again and was successful at peeing.  By this time I really just wanted to go home - I found the hospital bed not very comfortable, and I kept thinking of my nice comfy bed and pillows waiting for me at home.

All of this ralphing wasn't actually a big deal - it was just water.  Much less drama than a normal up-chuck.

One disconcerting thing was I realized I woke up in different disposable underwear than I went into surgery in.  Although this seems obvious, it seems weird that a team full of people were up in my lady bits and I have zero memory of this.  Which is really grand when you think of it, spares you the indignity of it all.

Overall I'm not really in a lot of pain.  There seem to be four incisions.  I've been able to walk around the house a bit this morning.  I've stayed away from the big guns of Oxyc.odone - I am scared of it, I'd like to avoid it.  I am on Naproxin and Tylenol.  Slept ok last night, woke up and took a Tylenol around 2 am and went to the washroom.

Just ate some soup (with potatoes and carrots!  actual food!) and crackers last night, today am starting more regular food (I had a boiled egg and buckwheat for breakfast).  Doc warned against any gassy food, so I am trying to be careful.

Dr Love said I had much more endo than they thought I did, he was surprised I wasn't in more pain.  This is leading DH to think I am an amazing pain tolerator, but really it just goes to show endo isn't always excessively symptomatic.  He said it was deep, and I "made them work".  He told DH I was not have sugar, dairy or meat that wasn't local organic.  This is excellent, it makes much more of an impression on DH when he hears it from a doc instead of from me (probably because I like to go on wild and crazy diets).

I believe Dr Love said this should really increase our chance at pregnancy.  My hopped-up-on-goofballs brain at the hospital may have added the word "tremendously", or it might have actually been there.  The phrase "we may actually have a baby" kept going over in my head - amazing.

Overall it was a phenomenal day.  The negatives weren't too bad, and the positive - this may really help our chances, this surgery was not a waste at all - really outweighed all the discomforts.  Prayer buddy, you are doing a great job!  Thank you so much to all the ladies (especially Jelly Belly) who encouraged me to get this done, even after several doctors had told me flat out "You don't have endo".

Tuesday, March 20, 2012

The Pre Game Show, afternoon edition

In further excruciating detail........

2:00pm Whipped up my Purg-o-dan packet.  I am supposed to take one hour to finish it.  Feeling quite tired now - really have to push myself do pay bills and clean out my gym bag (to-do items I set during my energetic morning).

3:00pm  Am heading for a nap upstairs (closer to the bathroom, just in case?).  I am suddenly bone-tired.  Having a nap in my sunny bedroom is heaven!  (ok, I am not really good at sleeping in the day, so I just laid there for a spell).

5:00pm  2nd set of Misoprostal timed quite poorly with the Purgodan kicking in.  I somehow got a shower in, and everything was resolved.  TMI, my cervix didn't really seem 'soft', so I do think I needed this second dose.  I will not be needing a second dose of Purgodan, thankfully!  Have finished the required 6 cups of fluids (broth, apple juice, water).

6:00pm  DH is home!  Hurrah!  He ate dinner while I had jello.  Let me tell you, this was the best jello I have ever made.  White grape juice + unflavoured gelatin = manifique!  I just put down some apple juice jello in the hopes of recreating this goodness.  Tired and kinda weak.  I suspect a sandwich would fix this.  I've been reading and whatnot, but I think the TV is about to go on - I am just too tired now (but not actually tired enough to sleep).  DH is off to practise, he'll be home probably after I'm in bed.  So let's see what Mrs Jessica Fletcher is up to....

7:00pm  Sooo hungry.  I just want to walk into the kitchen and have a little nosh.  More jello it is.  Not fully done with the purge yet. 

8:00pm  I could really go for some potato chips now!  Maybe some salty chicken broth will be a similar thing...

9:00pm  Sleepy.  Last of the jello.  Night all!  Wish me luck tomorrow! Hopefully I will get at least some answers - or in my fantasy this magically was the last problem left for us and we make a baby no problem after this!  (Wouldn't that be grand?  Somehow I don't think so.  But we'll see.)

01:30am:  Assplosion for 10 min.  VERY painful.  I hope this is not a harbinger of things to come!

The Pre Game Show, morning edition

In perhaps too much detail............

7:30am  The Last Breakfast.  Toad in the Hole!  Half a banana and an orange also snuck in before the 8am deadline.  1 cup decaf Green tea.  Overexcited.

8am  Another cup o' decaf Green Tea

9am  2 pills up the Vajayjay.  Not as bad as I thought.  Having tons of energy.  Putting away laundry.

9:30am  Cup of Kombucha.  Dusted.  Still sort of hyper.

10am  Cup of water.  Dusted floors.  Bought a groupo.n for DH and I to take a sewing class.  Reviewed all the tips for surgery you lovely ladies left on my blog!  Packed hospital bag - licorice drops (thanks MHE!), granny panties (Can I mention I love these?  They are huge and go up to like my chin, and come in soft pastel shades.), book (Harry Potter 1, in case you are wondering - calm and soothing and friendly), warm socks, passport + driver's license + health card + insurance card (Just in case -   if they have a pharmacy there.  Otherwise not needed.).

10:30am  Cup of water.  Realize maybe I need a larger pad than I've packed or own, pop out to the grocery store to buy the biggest thickest pads I can find.  Also pick up more unflavoured gelatin (a girl can't have too much unflavoured gelatin around!) and can't help but buy some SEEDS for planting, since it is beautiful out!

11:00am  Bowl of chicken broth.  Start fooling around in the garden.  Goal is to plant spinach in a planter, and cherry tomato seeds in a wee little seed starter pot.  Which I long to bring inside and put on the windowsill, but DH would shoot me (he doesn't want bugs in the house).

11:30am  Cup of water, cup of Kombucha.  Still fooling around in the garden.  My compost has 5000 sow bugs (which I would have called potato bugs, but I think this was in error), so I manually de-bug it (mostly) before it goes in the planter.  What the heck, it is nice out, I'm not in a rush.  I wish I had a solar oven to back my compost - maybe I will build one.

12:00pm  Cup of apple juice.  Big surprise - FLOWERS come from Feather!!!  Yay!  So cheery!  Loves!  :)  Makes me feel so special.  They really cheer the place up!  :)  Here they are in front of my front door.

12:30pm  Bowl of chicken broth.  Wrap up gardening.  Still have rather a lot of energy.  It is odd - I'm not really usually this chipper.

1:15pm  Cup of water.  Starting to be a bit more normal (aka, less energetic).  Also probably due to the fact I got so much sun, even with the UV still rather low (only a titch of Vitamin D probably made).  Back into pjs and catching up on some emails.

Alright, onto the scary part of the day.... so far today has kinda been great.  Quiet, sunny, warm.  No cramping or nausea from the Misoprostol after all, that turned out to be no big deal.  (Phew!)  I have not thought about work once.  :)

Monday, March 19, 2012

Plan for day before surgery

The big pre-game show starts tomorrow.  Man, I was a mess at work today.  I was SUPER freaked out for a while.  I don't know why, I was just so nervous.  I kept looking at the calendar and March 21st kept jumping out at me!  I know it's not a big deal and everything will be fine, but still...  I was ok by lunch.  I think focusing on work helped, and so did eating outside. 

Anyway, I thought I would share my plan for tomorrow - it's a good thing it says in bold on the sheet from my doc's DO NOT GO TO WORK - there is a ton to do!  Although most of you have already been through this, this may one day help someone that is about to have a lap.

0800  Breakfast (regular) must be finished.
0900  2 pills Misoprostal (Cytotec).  And it isn't taken orally, if you get my drift.  (Side effects, nausea and cramps)  Slightly frightened.  The pharmacist told me to go to the emerg if I have heavy bleeding.  But it now occurs to me - I'm on my period, yo.  It is used in nulliparous women to soften the cervix.  (This is my new word of the day - means having carried no pregnancy to >20 wks.  Maybe I should name my blog to 'Club Nulliparous'?)
1300  Call hospital to confirm surgery.  Wouldn't that be lovely to be rescheduled?!?
1400  1 package Purg-o-Dan. ("A Smart Way to Purge Away") - ROFL.  Hahah.  That is the first thing I read when I opened the package.  Very frightened.  The Internet suggests I will need reading material on the commode.  Oy vey.
1700  2 pills Misoprostal if needed.  That's a tricky one, I think.  How am I supposed to know if I need it?  I think it is more like "If I can tolerate it".
1900  2nd package of Purg-o-Dan if needed.
0400  No more fluids.

Tomorrow I am all clear fluids and broth and unscented soap/shampoo.  I don't get what the deal is with the clear fluids.  Why is white cranberry juice ok but red cranberry juice not ok?  The Purgodan is quite specific about it, and the nurse at the doc's office was very particular as well.

Our freezer is a treasure chest of broth now, we've been making broth for weeks.  I just made some white grape juice jello - that will be a nice treat tomorrow.  I also bought some Kambucha (green tea and peach), and some organic cloudy apple juice.  Plenty of food!  There are dire warnings about not having enough fluids, so I think I should be fine.  And of course, water.

Work was pretty stressful today, but when I left "I am free! I am free!" kept dancing through my head.  My boss stopped by and said nice things like, "Don't worry about it, we'll be fine" and "So and so in Shanghai can do that, don't worry about calling in".  That was nice.  Helped me to let go.  :)

Type at you tomorrow.

Saturday, March 17, 2012

She's here...

... and I completely shocked myself when I made a little happy noise when I saw her calling card!  (Aunt Flo, we are speaking of)
Hah!  First time I've been happy to see her in a long time!  ;)

On, now the surgery seems more 'real'.  Like this is really going to happen.  I went and got my scary prescriptions for the day before surgery.  Now off to buy some granny panties!  ;)

Thursday, March 15, 2012

Sort of annoying, but not that unexpected...

No sign of AF.

I was hoping to be done AF before surgery so that the doc can look around the uterus unhampered, but it seems like it is not to be.  If AF came tomorrow, I'll still likely have TEBB.  So for now I should just chill out and be patient.  I was quite stern with AF yesterday, that didn't work - so now I'm just going to chill and wait her out.  She has to come eventually, right?  I'd have a faint line at least by now if I was going to catch, right?

Wednesday, March 14, 2012

She's going for another record ladies and gents!

"CS from IF Me is attempting to beat her personal best score of CD31.  She is already at CD30 - will she make it to CD32?  Or will AF not come at all? She will most likely POAS tomorrow - stay tuned for the latest news and updates!"

Monday, March 12, 2012

AF head games

Thank you so much for your comments and tips for surgery!  They are all a big help.  It makes it a lot easier knowing so many have gone before me.  :)

Ok, on to the weirdness that is the last few days.

AF STILL hasn't shown up, nor left any calling cards.  I thought yesterday I might have seen a bit of spotting, but still no dice today.

And the boobies.  I can't get through a 2WW without discussions about the boobies, can I?  So for AGES they weren't sore this cycle.  I had this post flying around in my head about how wonderful progesterone cream is.  I have had sore boobies from ~CD18 onwards since Feb 2011 when those overly 'hot' Chinese herbs threw me.  This month - no sore boobies!  Hooray!  No need to wear sports bras to work!   I can run up stairs with impunity!

Until yesterday.  That would have been CD27.  Normally they chill out right before AF comes.


Most likely it is because I stopped the prog cream at like CD24 because I realized I want AF to come in a timely manner this month.  And they are so sore.  Or is it because I've gone bananas on (goat) dairy this month?

But you know how it is.  The little voice in my head says, "Could this be it?"

Since today is CD28, I tested this morning - BFN.  No surprise there. I only have two pg tests left before the motherload comes in - should I waste another tomorrow?  I was so sure AF had come in the night because I was so crampy this morning, but no dice.

I will keep y'all posted!

Saturday, March 10, 2012

Tips for Surgery?


My laproscopy is coming up - 10 days away!  I was wondering if perhaps any of you ladies had any tips or tricks?  Sorry I haven't posted in a while - I've had lots of posts swimming around in my head, no time to put them down on 'paper'.

I am hoping above all that this surgery turns out to be worthwhile.  I mean ideally they will find something broken and fix it and babies will rain from heaven.  But if that doesn't happen - I hope at least questions are answered!

For surgery tips I found this on the Internet which I thought was quite good - do you ladies have anything to add?

Some questions I have - I am planning on buying some more loose underwear - should I go for granny panties or regular?  I am also thinking of getting a cheap nightgown or two - I am more of a pjs kinda gal, but what if my abdomen is too sensitive for pants?

Should DH plan to work from home the day after surgery, or will I be ok on my own?  What about 2 days after?

Next weekend I am planning to cook like a madwoman to have lots of frozen food ready, and to clean the house so it is all nice and clean for me to hangout in.  I have started taking a million books off hold at the library so I will have tons of things to read/listen to (unauthorized biography of tom cruise audiobook anyone?! - amongst more serious things) - there is only so much Murder, She Wrote a gal can watch in one day.  ;)

I just want AF to come and be done by the time the surgery starts - and she isn't here yet.  Seriously - AF has terrible timing.  When you actually want her here - no sign of here!  WTIF!  I am actually starting to get pissed every time I go to the washroom and I see no spotting.  So opposite of normal.  Pray for her to just get here already - I want to be done TEBB by next Wednesday, so the doc has a clear view when he's looking at the uterus.

Sunday, March 4, 2012

Getting Ready

I just bought TONS of fertility supplies, to be ready for the months after the surgery.  Shipping takes a long time from the company I order from, so I just ordered tons of stuff that should be good for several months of TTC.  Lots of pg sticks, LH strips, pre-seed, Fe.rtileCM, progesterone cream - everything an infertile gal needs!  ;)

At work I have so far only told two people I am going to be out.  To one I simply said "I'm going to be out for 3 weeks" - and that was it.  No further questions came.  I guess I am kind of getting a by since a lot of people are going on sabbatical, so people are probably assuming I am using part of my sabbatical.

To a guy on my team, I said I was going to be out for 3 weeks, and he said, "Why?", and I said "I have a small surgery", and his eyes bugged out a bit, but he didn't say anything further.  Good.  That's the first test.  So far I am under the radar.

Last night we had a big hot pot party at our house - DH's friends.  It was really fun, everyone (me included) drank a lot of wine.  But I somehow spent most of the evening chatting with a new mom.  I do really like her, but at some point I was thinking "UGH.  Blah blah blah baby.  Enough!".  It was really too much baby/preggo talk.  I need to be more skillful at changing the conversation.  The problem is, I sort of like talking about babies.  I held her super cute and good baby for a while - have to say, it is fun to hold babies. 

I thought I was going to be close to telling her our trouble of TTC, but it never sort of come up in conversation.  I even got a bit emotional thinking the big question was about to come "When are you guys going to have a baby?", and I was trying to prep myself to answer honestly - but it never came.  Do people sort of guess, or are they so wrapped up in themselves they don't think to ask?  At some point a preggo at the party asked me if I had any announcements coming after I had made some baby remark, and I was like "Do you see me pouring wine down my throat?".  Yeesh.

For this girl, the only impediment to them having a baby was convincing her husband it was time.  HAH!  NOT our problem!  My sweet DH was ready for a baby on our honeymoon!  But she turned 34 and decided she was getting old, so they better start., I turn 34 this summer.  Wah wah.  Odds are there will be no bun in the IF Me oven by then.  (FYI, they got pg on the first try)

Even in church today it was all Abraham and Sarah, and the cross of Infertility got only a passing mention.  I was sort of cheesed at how lightly it was handled - this is my life's obsession (currently).

Saturday, March 3, 2012

Bad Dreams

It is already CD19.  Amazing how fast a cycle goes when you're not trying.  I mean, sure, we BD'd on an appropriate day, but we all know nothing will come of it.  I am just hoping AF comes nice and on time so she is fully outta here by the surgery date.  Dr Love said it is best to not be on AF so he can take a good look around the uterus.

Oddly, the boobies are not yet sore.  Once they start, I will start prog cream again - but only until ~CD24, so AF will come on time - don't want to delay her.  Or hrm, maybe I'll start some prog cream tomorrow - I really can't believe how this cycle has flown by.  Hardly any 'pinches' during the follicular phase, also weird.

So I woke up feeling terrible after this dream I had last night.  I dreamt my cousin casually announced they were pg.  This is relevant because his wife (they have been married ~ 6 months) has SUPER bad endo, and I think perhaps only 1 ovary - in short, all sorts of lady troubles.  So in my dream I was shocked, and after they left cried boo hoo into a pillow.  But really - I need to get my head out of my as$.  I should be super happy for them if they conceive.  Period.

I need to get over this jealousy thing.  I think it comes down to that I am super jealous when I here people are pg (unless it is an IF-er).  Jealousy is a lame emotion, it only leads to bad things.  DH thinks it is bad karma for us not to be happy when people are pg - maybe he is right.  But how to get over it?  How have y'all dealt with jealousy?

Appleseed grows

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