No surprises.

"Helloooooooo"

"Ah, my dear Aunt Flo.  Wee bit early this month, aren't you?"

"No one likes a tardy Aunt!"

"I disagree."

"Mmm.  And how are we today?"

"Awful.  You suck.  And you're hurty."

"Now now.  Words can hurt too."

"And you've made me feel slightly nauseous all day.  Thanks for that."

"Sarcasm is a tool of the weak, dear."