Monday, January 24, 2011

Rant.

So normally I would wait to post until after my acupuncture appt tonight, but I'm so upset....

So today in a meeting with my boss, we were discussing two weeks ago when we'd really clashed over a few things and I think we were both really frustrated with each other, she told me I had an attitude problem.

She also made sure to mention that not only was my potential future promotion contingent on technical knowledge, it was also contingent on attitude.

Like, joke's on you, I don't CARE if I get promoted, I just want to get preggo and get the heck out of dodge!

But one doesn't say that in such meetings.  I tried to give her some feedback about what in her behaviour had contributed to our clashes, but she paid no attention, she continued to do no wrong.  Ugh.  She even said, "I don't know if you were having problems in your personal life or what, but..." - like, yeah, my entire life since about July has been one huge personal problem!

I worry my job really is too stressful for me, and I've tried to bring this up a few times, and she seems to understand at the time, but I don't think she gets it.  She really does live for work, ok for her, but I don't want to do that.

If we are starting adoption in September and it may take two years after that.... do I want to work there that long?  The money is good is a serious reason to stay... and again, a promotion would mean more money, which is better for my family (we're really trying to sock it away now in preparation of me potentially not working), but is it worth it?!?

Augh!  I am violating my 'do not think about work at home' rule tonight!  Augh!  I do not enjoy confrontation, and I'm sure I'll be replaying this in my head all night.  Hopefully Dr T can release this stress with a needle!

4 comments:

  1. I'm so sorry that you're dealing with work stress!!! I hope that your acupuncture apppointment helped!

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  2. Oh dear. I hope you somehow sort things out with her.

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  3. why don't you give yourself a "timeline" as to how long you want to stay there to sock away the $$$ (milk them for now) and then in the meantime think about where you want to work or not work and research into that while you are still working. I agree 2 years is a long wait for the adoption and stressful as well to say the least so going to a job daily that also stresses you out does not really help. I hope something will work for you soon. Acupuncture/yoga never fails us! When i see you again i'll give you a great big HUG!

    I also thought about what to do with myself during the long adoption wait ..eek i will be 2 years older! the big 40!arrgh I better see a child by then!

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  4. She sounds like a horrible person to talk with, she sounds like she didn't take responsibility for any of the problems you two are having. I don't know if you should stay or go, but I know that you should be happy, if your waiting for your pregnancy or your adoption for a while, you can't be miserable the whole time, waiting is miserable enough! Is there anyway you could start shopping around for a job?

    A few years ago I gave up a full time/benefits job for nothing. I wanted to stay in the job because of the materiality leave but I am sure glad I did not. I would have been in that miserable job for 5 years by now. I have been poor, but I love my work and I think that is better, babies don't need much.

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